What does your sleep position says about you?

By Lottie Coltman  |  Sep 14, 2017
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Ever wondered what your sleep position says about you?

No, neither have we.

Because generally, it means that is the position you fall asleep in and little else. It is in absolutely no way linked to your personality, unless you fall asleep in a clown costume, singing Beyoncé songs and doing the can-can — in which case, it might say you’re an extrovert.

But where’s the fun in that? If sleep positions did mean anything, then we would like to think it was something along the lines of the following…

Starfish: You literally want to be a starfish, this is your life’s ambition. Sometimes you stick on extra fake legs and lay in the bath.

Side sleeper: You like to pretend you are a fence. Probably for people who are indecisive. Except instead of being on the fence, you are the fence. Get it?!

Fetal: Life is just too hard and you would prefer to return to the womb. You crave warmth and safety and amniotic fluid (ok, maybe not the last one).

Pillow hugger: You have strong feelings for inanimate objects. And we don’t blame you – they don’t snore, hog the cover or kick you in the middle of the night.

Log: You’re feeling restless. Why? Because you lack roots. *Insert drum noise that we’re not sure how to write phonetically*

Yearner: You experience intense cravings, probably for silly articles to stop telling you who you are as a person based on the way you lie when you’re in bed. Or Nutella – because who doesn’t crave Nutella?

Freefall: You’re too lazy to exercise and are hoping to use gravity to lose weight by allowing it to push your stomach back in. Nice try, we like your thinking.

So, there we have it – a totally pointless guide to sleep position personalities that mean absolutely nothing.

The good news is that because we know a lot about sleeping habits, we have been able to create one perfect mattress that suits them all. To find out more about how your bedtime behaviour impacts your daytime self, read more here.

 

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