BedMD: How to Sleep with a Loud Roommate
Sharing your living space can be one of the toughest examples of compromise outside of the UN. Everyone has experienced a roommate who eats the last banana, leaves the lights on, and never takes out the trash. But the worst is when your roommate’s noise level prohibits your ability to sleep at night. There they go again — blasting Adele after yet another break-up. Here’s how you can deal with them without losing their half of the rent:
Noise canceling headphones
You can’t go wrong. Use them on your way to work, at the office, and most importantly, when you’re trying to sleep. Pop on one of the countless Spotify bedtime playlists or download a white noise app on your phone. No matter what you listen to, it’ll feel like your roommate is a million miles away and not on the other side of your wall.
Find the fuse box
Typically most folks don’t know how to operate the fuse box in their apartment. Make sure you do! Find it, and all the power will literally be yours. Shut the power off when things are getting too loud, and say you’ve called the electric company to “make sure they’re working on it.” When your roommate leaves to find light and internet, you can flip it back on and enjoy some peace and quiet. Fair warning: if you do this one too often, they might catch on.
Lock yourself inside the bathroom
Sounds immature, but it just might work. Sooner or later your roommate will have to pee or shower, but stand your ground. Say you’ll come out when Protip: bring your phone with you. You’ll need to scroll through something while you wait.
Social media shoutout
Whatever your roommate is doing, just grab your phone and capture Snapchat video of their actions. Add it to your Story, throw in a funny caption, and watch them squirm in embarrassment. Message received.
Be a little too subtle
If you think a noisy weeknight is on the horizon, emphasize you have “so much to do” that night while you’re having a catching up conversation during the day. You “think you’ll never get through it all” and “are so upset you’ll have to work all night.”
Cruise for a snooze
Chances are once you’re in bed you’re probably not going to want to get up, but when your roommate invites their loud friends over and you know what’s ahead for your thin walls, just take a walk or a go for spin until it’s their bedtime.
Talk to them
If all else fails, your best bet to talk about the noise level in your apartment with your roommate. Knock on their door and put on your best sleepy voice, and be polite. They’re not any scarier than the monster under your bed. Throw in a “love you” to seal the deal. And make sure you sell it — like when you’re faking being sick to get out of work.