The 8 Worst Things To Eat In Bed

By Tom Packman  |  Feb 8, 2017
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Whether it is a sneaky snack or a three course meal, we’ve all eaten in bed. Here is a handy guide of what you really shouldn’t consume in the sheets to save your bedding from needing to be replaced:

    1. Curry: From katsu to korma, bhuna to balti… curries are notoriously messy. One drop of massala on your crisp white sheets will spell disaster! Avoid at all costs.
    2. Roast dinner: The Sunday roast should be enjoyed at a dinner table. However, if you do want to consume in the convenience of your bed you would be wise to avoid gravy. An overflow of bisto would leave a very unfortunate spill.
    3. Anything with prawns: Prawns are delicious. But keep them in the kitchen. If one of those slippery shrimp flies overboard, lands under your bed and goes unnoticed, it can ruin your whole year.
    4. Apple pie and custard: If you’re going to eat it in bed, make sure you get the rations right. When pouring, it is easy to get a little overexcited and drown the pie in custard. It could drip over the sides and go everywhere.
    5. Hummus and pita: Fresh hot pita bread with a spread of hummus is the perfect snack. The problem is, there is no way to gently heat the pita bread. When it comes out of the toaster, it can be burning hot. This will prove to be dangerous, especially in bed. If you reach for the pita, not realising it’s hot, your fingers will burn and you end up tossing the whole thing everywhere.
    6. Jam donuts: Biting down on a sugary jam donut is one of life’s rare treats. But when you’re savouring your donut, the other side is leaking jam everywhere.
    7. Ice cream cone: If your ice cream is going to fall from its cone anywhere, it will be when you try and eat it on your bed. It’s called ‘sod’s law’.
    8. Runny fried eggs: There are countless ways to eat eggs, so for the sake of your linen we suggest it best to avoid the unpredictable yolk from having a chance to ruin your sheets! Opt for a more bed friendly scrambled egg, or even an omelette.

Or you could just wear a bib.

 

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